Ohhh..TIME is going waaayyy...TO FAST!!

I just received a call from the school district to start setting up Registration for Ben next year in their Preschool program ( it will be helping him out with his speech a little bit). Any hoo..I asked"now do we come and spend a little time with him on the first few times, to get him use to his new enviorment. She said "oh, first few days...maybe 5 or 10 minutes, and then he should be fine. Her next question being "Now you plan on him taking the bus to and from pre-school don't you" as if it was just a given. My response was "well ahhh...NO!! " I can bring him and pick him up. Her response "Oh...well the kids really love the bus, and it helps them adapt really well"

I understand her point, but hey I'm not ready to let someone take off with my child on a school bus, and me be totally out of any control in this situation. Ugg..it just gives me a VERY sick feeling to even think about that...Now to many of you, maybe no biggee, but since I have a daycare of my own, Ben has only been with me, and in my daycare enviorment. So...I'm just freakin out about this whole bus thing. I AM JUST NOT READY FOR ALL OF THIS YET. I STILL NEED AND WANT CONTROL!!! And frankly can't think about school and letting him go yet. He's still my little baby in which I am holding and keeping him from any harm or any scariness he may be feeling.

I never realized how him growing up was going to have such an impact on me...I was sitting and thinking the other day about the things he use to do, and the faces and gestures he use to make. It's gettin harder to remember when he was so young...I wish I could remember every little thing. I wish my memories were more vivid, because I am not ready to let go of my little baby yet...

I know my post is long and drawn out...I'm feeling a little blue about all this. It's just a new stepping stone, and I'm sure it will be an exciting adventure for all of us...I just wish it would sloooowww down!