Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Oh, to the Ladies Whom Love to Wear da Sandles!!!
Okay, it's almost SUUUUMMMMMEEER...at least here in the Great Northwest. I have been extremely busy this past few daaays, and really can't seem to sit down and write this week. This email came thru to me, so...I thought I'd pass it along. Thought it was kinda funny. Whoo hoo for the sunny days ahead of flipflops and shorts...
Alright ladies, it's that time of year "oncest" again!!! I think we
>need to be reminded of a few things. So my sisters, PLEASE, raise your big
>toes and repeat after me below....
> The Open Toed Shoe Pledge
> As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules
> when wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:
> I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over
> and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the
> and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.
> I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and
> I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.
> I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.
> I will shave the hairs off my big toe.
> I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker,
> mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I
>tuck it there.
> If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into
> place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.
> I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr.
> Scholl's if my feet need him.
> I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low
> price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids'
> is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can
> properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take
> with me as I fall and break my ankle.
> I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell
> and begin to look like Vienna sausages.
> I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she
> asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell
> her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look
> I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they
> and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT
> to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.
> I will promise to go my local nail salon at least once per season and
> have a real pedicure (they are about $35 and worth EVERY penny).
> I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs
> of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals